Dining with Royalty!

So it was bound to happen. An invitation to dinner at Windsor palace. Of course this inter-continental diva would fit in there; the pomp, the circumstance, the princes! It really is the natural progression for me, so I wasn't surprised when my invitation arrived, though it did come somewhat earlier than I might have expected... Too bad I was serving rather than eating!



As you well may know, it is necessary for a diva to wear many gowns in her career. Sometimes it is the evening gown of the opera stage, sometimes the teacher's frock, and on far too many occasions than I care to admit, I put on my waitress apron and carry canapes for the upper crust. I have worked at all sorts of events, back home in Vancouver, and now here in London, and I've discovered that it is a fabulous way to see some of the sights from an insider's perspective, and to make a little money while I'm at it. So, when the opportunity to serve dinner at the oldest occupied castle in the world arose, I jumped at the chance.



I was booked for the job weeks in advance and had to pass a security check. On the day of the dinner, I had to bring my passport with me along with a proof of address. I was picked up, along with the other excited waiters, at the Hammersmith Apollo Cinema, and two small coaches drove us out to Windsor. Then 50 min drive gave us an opportunity to sign the incredibly binding confidentiality agreement... so don't tell anyone what I'm about to share! (To be honest, I'll have to keep some things tight lipped, but I don't mind spilling a few tidbits about the evening)



When we arrived at the castle, we had to go through 2 more security checks. At the first we were issued passes and had our passports/proof of address checked. At the second, we passed through metal detectors, and our bags went through an x-ray machine, just like airport security. We entered the castle grounds and I was absolutely blown away. I don't know what it is about me, but I am rarely expecting to be impressed at these historical sights, and s am always taken by surprise. The size of the grounds and the ancient walls was impressive and I was particularly thrilled by the juxtaposition of the planes flying into Heathrow that I could see overhead just above the castle turrets.

We were led into the basement of the castle, and to the kitchen/staff areas. It wasn't particularly exciting down there, though the kitchen (one of the many I'm sure) was neat. All lovely copper pots and pans hanging about. When we were all inside, we were briefed: Tonight was Prince William's first charity dinner. He would be in attendance and this is a very big deal! All the management were on high alert. We were split into teams and assigned our duties. I was assigned to my own table, but most importantly, to the table of HRH (His Royal Highness)! Yup. My team was responsible for serving the "top table" and I was to be mere inches away from the young, bachelor, prince! My first thought was obviously that the prince would lay eyes on me, immediately see me for the diva that I am and pluck me from my serving job to sit beside him as his guest for dinner. All these years, my mother was right; "Go to London and meet Prince William, that's all you need to do". Fancy that!



But before HRH could fall madly in love with me, I had to practice how to put food down in front of him, with all the grace and elegance of a 5-star waiter. The serving team clambered up the stairs into St. George's Hall. Wow! now there is a venue! It was grand and opulent and everything you would expect to see at a castle, with suits of armor and decorative shields lining the walls. The tables were all set up and brilliantly decorated. And we started practising. First we practiced how w were going to carry the food in, then how we were going to clear it. We talked about serving bread to the guests, breaking napkins for them, how to address them and what never to say. It was a crash course in fine dining.

And then it was go time! The dinner was amazing beautiful food, beautiful people and lots of wine. The serving staff was run off our feet, making sure every aspect of the food service was flawless. We were well rehearsed and polished, all having passed grooming checks and plate carrying challenges. White gloves and black ties, we looked impeccable, and so did the food. When we served the first course, it was off to HRH's table and the whole team was buzzing with excitement. What would he look like in person? Would he be rude or polite? would he even notice the lowly waiters and waitresses swarming around him making sure his evening was perfect?

Turns out; he looks a lot older in person. He is the same age as I am, but he looked to me to be almost forty, the bald spot on the top of his head not withstanding. He had such deep wrinkles on his face, it made me pity him a bit. He must have a lot of pressures in his life despite his raised status. He was otherwise very polite, though wholly uninterested in the beautiful Diva placing gourmet dishes down in front of him, and, to my complete surprise, he is a very messy eater!

The dinner really was fabulous and after it ended, we cleaned the hall and cleared the tables, returning it to its original splendor. We loaded ourselves into coaches and headed back into London, close to 1am. It was a fantastic night all around, and as I climbed into bed, I thought about how few people would ever have the experience that I had just had. I also help out hope that the glimmer in HRH's eye had something to do with him seeing me, falling madly in love, and he was now sending his footmen out to scourer the city for the beautiful serving girl... a la Cinderella. These thoughts lulled me to sleep.

Imagine my surprise and disappointment when I woke to discover that HRH had called a press conference to announce his long awaited engagement to Kate! I guess I have to go find myself Harry.